I’ve lost my way with the blog over recent months.
Since starting in May 2019, I averaged close to a new post each week for the first two years. However, since August 2021, I’ve written just 25 posts (including this one) – an average of one per fortnight.
It is easy to come up with excuses. Work has been really busy over the past 12 months. Life in general has been really busy. Finding the time to write is difficult. Though, to be frank, that’s all utter nonsense. I’ve found plenty of time to do other things. To trawl through Facebook, Instagram, the BBC Football website, the Hot UK Deals website, various rock/guitar blogs, and to watch movie trailers. I find the time each day to complete Wordle, Heardle, Globle, and Framed. I find the time to disappear into a world of music playlists and new albums for an hour or two at a time. Yet I can’t find an hour each week to write a blog post? That’s absolute bullshit…
It’s a classic case of finding comfort in the easy things in life, rather than getting started on the truly meaningful parts which are a little more difficult to address but are so much more fulfilling.
And this blog is fulfilling. I enjoy writing it. I do still believe it’s important to share these details and to ensure mental health is no longer seen as a taboo subject. That is why the frequency of posts will return to one per week from now on. That is why the mojo / inspiration which has been missing for the best part of 12 months has returned. That is why, despite having written about this before ( I’ve lost a bit of my enthusiasm for the blog over recent weeks… – Yes, You Can Do it (yesyoucandoit.net) / I’m experiencing writer’s block for the first time – Yes, You Can Do it (yesyoucandoit.net) ), I’m more determined than ever to get back on track this time around.
One thing I will be shying away from though is stating what I intend to achieve. Instead, I’ll be updating on certain areas once I’ve achieved them. I used to think that sharing my intentions would make me more accountable and better set up for success. Turns out that’s also a load of nonsense. Think about my weight loss posts (I’m no healthier or trimmer now than I was 3 years ago). Think about my grand plans to publish an e-book of the first 100 YYCDI blog posts (there’s still no content other than this blog). Think about other writing ideas or general aspirations that I’ve written about in these blog posts – not many of them have come to fruition. It’s been bloody painful admitting that and typing it here but it’s true. So, from now on, I’ll be keeping those details inside and sharing updates / news when it’s appropriate to do so (but certainly only when I’ve achieved things and actually ticked the boxes). That seems to be the better way for me right now. Plus, I don’t want to share every detail of my life all the time. I realise there’s a certain degree of irony to that statement when I write frequent blog posts about mental health and life’s challenges but hopefully you’ll get where I’m coming from. The core blog content remains important to me and I’ll continue writing. It’s just that some details are best kept private, for a certain degree of time at least.
I’ve found writing this post to be deflating. I’m pissed off I haven’t maintained the weekly posts over the past year. I’m pissed off I have struggled to get as inspired as I was 2 and 3 years ago. I’m pissed off that I haven’t achieved many of the priority objectives I’ve had over the past 3 years. I’m pissed off that right now, it feels like I’m an under-achiever. Quite often though, it’s important to feel like this to give ourselves an opportunity to step back and take a broader view; to reset and reframe things; to pretty much start again. And that reminds me of a couple of lines from a brilliant song by my favourite band (The Lottery Winners):
Get up and start again (Open your eyes or you’ll never see it)
Get up and start again (You might just find the things you most needed)
This post is for those who feel you’re failing. Those who feel you’re a disappointment to yourself. Those who feel a little down in the dumps at the moment when those personal feelings of disappointment, self-criticism, failure and fear are exacerbated by nothing but bad news on our TV screens and social media feeds. You’re not failing – life is bloody difficult right now and merely surviving is an achievement. But please take a few minutes to step back and take a broader look. You will almost certainly have much to be proud of. You will almost certainly have much to appreciate. You absolutely have it within you to get up and start again.
Onwards and upwards. Don’t beat yourself up so much – try a little kindness instead. Not always easy but ridiculously important. Please try to be as kind to yourself as you will be to others.
As always, thanks for reading and take care.